Wednesday, March 18, 2009

Fail mom.

Sometimes my husband and I like to spend Saturday night cruising the Internet for funny videos. It's just one of the many ways we've got this economy beat. Date night on a budget? No problem. We just grab a couple beers from the fridge, fire up the laptop and we're good to go. Who needs to spend ten bucks each on a movie and pay a babysitter when there's YouTube in the house?

Not only is it free, it's undeniably entertaining (like in a how old are we? kind of a way but still). And you can find just about anything. Like, sleepwalking dogs!

Or, David Bowie making fun of Ricky Gervais!

Or, probably the funniest cat video you'll ever see (I'll watch that for the title alone!).

There are also a whole bunch of "FAIL" videos that are kind of hit-or-miss but pretty funny. They're sort of like America's Funniest Videos except the word FAIL has replaced Bob Saget's commentary about drunk Uncle Lou taking down the bride in a money dance gone wrong or little Bobby trying out his new wiffle ball bat on daddy's groin.

Now, I love me some America's Funniest Videos but for some reason the whole FAIL thing strikes me as even funnier. I think I just like the word. It's so direct. Way more direct than most of us ever are. Just think about all the situations you could use it that you never, ever would. Like if a cashier gave you the wrong change and instead of saying, "Oh, I think I actually gave you a twenty," you just said, "You failed."

There are even specific genres within the genre. Like Fail Dogs. Fail Dogs? The name alone cracks me up. There are probably Fail Cats too but I've already seen the funniest cat video ever (well, probably the funniest cat video ever) so I didn't bother looking it up.

Today, as I put Liam's crib back together so he would be forced to take a nap and return from the land of sleep deprivation and public tantrums, I thought, I should make a fail moms video. It could be like a montage of pictures and videos of moms with good intentions failing despite their best effort but instead of the supportive or encouraging things we're used to hearing from one another (like, This is just a difficult stage, He'll grow out of it, I went through that exact same thing with my daughter, It's a tough transition for all kids...), it would just say FAIL.

For example, you'd see a video of a woman pick an exhausted child in a pre-tantrum state up off the library floor and carry him kicking and screaming to the car.


Then you'd see her convert her three year old's toddler bed back into a crib.


And place the (still tantruming) child in the crib and leave the room while he screamed, "I'm not tired! I'm not tired!"


It would probably not show the child fall asleep and take a 4 hour nap, waking up almost back to his well-rested, happy self. You know why? SUCCESS is just not as funny as FAIL (even when it's a temporary success that feels at the time like a two steps back kind of fail).

I've already converted the crib back into a bed and Liam went to sleep in it just fine tonight. Naps are more challenging for him though so we'll wait and see how he does tomorrow. We have been very careful to explain to him why we're doing what we're doing. It's not that he's failed at sleeping in a bed; it's that moving from a crib to a bed is a big change that might take a while to get used to. No big deal. Eventually it will all click into place but in the meantime, I reserve the right to use the crib if needed. Because I don't care how big a FAIL it is, an overtired kid is no laughing matter.


I don't have any actual skills when it comes making videos but if I did, what MOM FAIL moment would you like to contribute to my project? It could be something you've done as a mom, something your mom did to you, or something you've witnessed (hopefully not at the Inglewood Library around story time yesterday). I had so much fun reading about your love/hate relationships with your pets (as I'm sure you did reading about each others) that I'm dying to hear more. Keep the funnies coming!


CelinaQ said...

Dude, Maggie, that cat video was HI-larious! And I really like the sleep walking dog, too.
:D No fail!

MarvelousMOM said...

That dog one is hysterical. I almost peed my pants I was laughing so myself!!! Tears were streaming down my face. hahahaha

hezza said...

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