It's been a year. And aside from a brief moment in time when he was this close to starting a new mother's day out, he has been at home with me. No wonder I am just now getting around to finishing the Encore application. Mama's got her hands full!
I have tried filling it out several times but each time I pick it up, I hesitate. More than half the packet is information about Individuals with Disabilities. Because apparently, being smart makes you different and being different makes you disabled. I know I shouldn't care. It doesn't really mean anything. But it still bothers me.
I'm probably just remembering how awkward it felt when I was sent away with the other smart kids to dissect cows' eyes or learn how to etch glass once a week. It made me feel different from the "normal" kids in class but since I didn't quite fit in with the "smart" kids either (sorry but dissecting cows' eyes is not exactly my idea of fun) I had no choice but to feel like a weirdo. That's a far cry from fitting in (which is all I ever really wanted).
Maybe it's because I was a girl. Or because I was super self conscious. Or because there were not that many "gifted" kids in my class. Or because they always pulled us out on the one day a week we got to do art. Or because I was waaaay shy and never made friends with the smart kids (or so much as opened my mouth to speak). Maybe it's because I was lazy and didn't want to learn more or try harder. Quite possibly it was all of the above.
But Liam is not me. He's a lot like me, but he's not me. And I need to remember that. He might love Encore. He might not. He may or may not even be given the chance to find out. But none of that is up to me. By filling out the application I'm not casting a vote or making a choice. I'm just opening a door, allowing an option to be explored. It's sort of like a job interview. Sure you want them to like you but it's just as important that you like them. No one wants to be hired for a job they hate. But if you didn't put on your best suit and check it out, you'd have no way of knowing either way.
So, I'm going to send the application today. And we'll see. If it's the right fit, we'll move forward. And if it's not, at least I got a big pile of Individuals with Disabilities crap out of my house!
Liam makes a sentence! "Go up the sky."
He knows it's backwards; he likes it that way.
And he couldn't find an "S" for "Sky" so he used a "C" instead.
Because "Sky" with a C is different. And different is good.