Friday, April 9, 2010

Disclaimer: This is not exactly a real post.

It’s just a quick note to say that A) I’m alive, and B) Yes, I do realize I disappeared again. Also, maybe C) I’m sorry about that. Did I really just apologize to a computer screen? Ewww. Now I’m sorry about that.

D) Blogging is weird.

It really is weird, and not just because it encourages sleepy pregnant women to chat with The Internet late at night. It’s weird because it is both a creative outlet and a public forum. Can you see how that easily creates a conflict of interest? As a creative outlet, blogging is a great way to work through difficult issues or vent frustrations or try to make sense of things that absolutely do not make sense otherwise. But, as a public forum this can be wholly inappropriate. I mean, who wants to air their dirty laundry for all to read? Oh, most bloggers do? Right. Good point. I have to admit, there is something very freeing about airing things out. Like once you are completely honest about something, it no longer feels like a problem. But still. There are many exceptions to this rule.

Say the issue you’re wishing to work through is not exactly your issue. Something is happening to you, sure, but only by way of somebody you love. You want to turn to your creative outlet but know that the hopes and fears and triumphs and tribulations of other people are definitely off limits. No matter how much you experience their joy or pain or devastation as if it were your own, you know it’s just not your story to tell.

While I am sure there are lots of people out there who can write about one thing while not writing about another, I don’t know that I’m one of them. To me it’s like the elephant in the room. I know there’s an elephant there that I’m not supposed to mention and I’m trying really hard not to mention it, but all I can see in my mind is ELEPHANT, ELEPHANT, ELEPHANT!!! If I were to sit down to write, you can be pretty darn sure I’d come up with a story about elephants.

I mean, if I had to write several times a week no matter what kind of crap was going on around me, I’m sure I could work it out. But I don’t. So I don’t. Instead I turn to my other creative outlet: watching TV while I wait for things to work themselves out on their own. That’s creative, right?

Anyway, I think the elephant has finally left the building so hopefully I’ll be able to get reacquainted with my old friend Laptop in the days ahead. Although my new friend 48 Hours Hard Evidence is pretty hard to say no to. “What’s that TV? Another woman was murdered and it turns out her husband was the killer? No way! I never woulda seen it coming…” I’m telling you, that show just won't take no for an answer.


Cora White said...

I so feel ya on the elephant in the room. Glad that you and baby are doing well.

No Mommy Brain said...

thanks, cora! we definitely are. :)