Sometimes I wish I could take pictures with my eyes.
This morning in the shower was one of those times. I was holding Finn just right so the water would rain down his shoulders and over his round little belly, keeping him warm but not too warm, and being extra careful not to let him slip. His face was close to mine and his long, beautiful eyelashes were collecting tiny drop of water. He was captivated by it. By all of it. The warmth, the water, the steam, the bubbles, his skin, my hair...all of it.
With his face so close to mine, he looked different than usual. More perfect somehow. His quiet eyes, wide and curious, looked from me to the water and back to me as if to say, "Do you see how awesome this is?" When I'd look back at him like, "Yes! It's amazing!" his perfect lips would curl into a sly smile revealing those beautiful big teeth with all the gaps situated just so. Then he'd smack the pool of water that gathered in the space where his body met mine and splash and splash and splash until it was all gone and he could watch it fill up again.
Each second that passed was a moment I wanted to hang onto forever. "If only I had a camera," I thought. But I knew it wouldn't capture it. Not all of it. And probably not the way I wanted it captured.
I love pictures but sometimes they are supremely bad at capturing the moment you want captured. I guess that's what the memory is for. I just wish it was more dependable.