Remember that thing I wrote a few days ago about feeling uncomfortable about over-sharing on the Internet? I think I might have been having a sensitive day. Like I stepped in a big pile of self-consciousness and, rather than shaking it off Taylor Swift style, I decided to wear it like an unflattering jumpsuit for all to see.
Then, as if that wasn't enough, I thought I'd better DO something about it. I mean, I can't just get all publicly insecure and declare something isn't working for me and not DO something, right? So I went on Instagram and blocked/unfollowed every single person. Every. Single. Person. Like a take back the night rally over pictures of my kids.
I immediately regretted it.
Not just because it made me see that I actually do like the social aspect of Instagram most of the time (it forces you to be more creative if you know someone else will see your work - and by work I'm talking clever emoji use, and seeing your friend's pictures is fun) but also because it made me feel sort of like a drama queen. If I hadn't been at my sister's house with zero responsibility and a long ass parade to sort of watch, I never would have taken the time to do something so lame.
It's pretty embarrassing that while people were writing thought-provoking essays in response to the Ferguson verdict and weaving tales of gratitude for Thanksgiving, the only thing I found the time to write was about little ole me. Blech. And now I'm doing it again! But this weekend with my family made me realize I come by it honestly. Man, do we love to over analyze ourselves! I'm not saying it's a problem but when it coincides with a blog and a speedy Internet connection, it can create a bit of a self consciousness hangover.
Because once it's out there, it's out there. No take backs, you know? How thankful am I that none of this was around when I was an (even more) awkward kid?!
I promise I will quit talking about this now but I can't promise I won't be insecure or awkward in the future. It happens. I'm sincerely thankful for all of you who check in here now and then and let me share my story, no matter how thoughtless or self serving it might happen to be. It's a journey I am honored to share with all of you.
And now? Some photos from Thanksgiving at my sister's house! We had a few fallen soldiers (Erick quarantined himself in the cellar, Finn rallied after only barfing once...) but all in all it was an awesome time. My sister did a fantastic job hosting and cooking and we were so thankful to be able to celebrate together with good food, freezing cold walks, all the card games, Capture the Flag with her new neighbors, a mint julep and some Christmassy stuff downtown, a past bedtime walk to the ice cream shop and, of course, lots and lots of talking. So much to be thankful for...